Don't give in to peer pressure bullying negotiations.1
From the time that I started practicing law others have told me do act in a particular way or do things differently using the argument “that's how everybody else does it.” In most instances this advice was accompanied by an explanation based on law, facts, or logic. In many instances I accepted this advice and changed my behavior. If a logical argument exists to do things in a better way then I support the better way. In many instances the advice could be summed up as the difference between how things are taught in school and how they are done in the real world.
In a number of instances other lawyers have presented arguments to do something differently but without any basis in law, fact, or logic. I have always experienced these arguments in the course of trying to negotiate an agreement to resolve litigation. I have never accepted these arguments in the absence of logic. The argument of doing something because everybody else does it is usually a compelling argument. Nobody wants to be different because doing something differently creates a sense of inferiority. However, arguing that a lawyer should do something or include a particular concept in a settlement agreement because “everybody else does it” without logic should be viewed as an act of malpractice. If a lawyer is reluctant to change their position then the last reason they should do so is because all other lawyers do so.
I recently settled a divorce case and the negotiations almost failed because the opposing lawyer wanted to include an anti-bankruptcy clause. When I rejected this the other attorney argued that I should include it because everybody else includes it. I sent the other attorney legal research which indicated that this paragraph would violate bankruptcy law to which the other attorney responded “all other attorneys include it.” She never provided any law or logic to explain why this clause did not violate bankruptcy law. Instead, she repeatedly told me that everybody else does it. She even told me that the Judge will instruct me to include it if we ask the judge. In other words, because she had no basis in law to support her position she resorted to bullying.
This sort of bullying should have no place in legal negotiations. Lawyers should always negotiate in good faith complying with the law as it applies to the facts and the litigation and the ethics that govern lawyers. Arguing that everybody else does it has no place in good faith negotiations.
1 I thank my wife, Sheila g Pransky, M.S.W., L.I.C.S.W. who explained the offensive behavior as “peer pressure bullying.”